An open letter to Joe Jack

[hoa nguyen]

You got no chance with me whatsoever. Zero.

That is all.

Now go ask yo daddy for some bullets.

[Joe Jack Onassis]

You got no chance with me whatsoever. Zero.

That is all.

Now go ask yo daddy for some bullets.

I try and be nice, and this is the thanks I get.  I could have set you up real nice--kept you out of the laundry room, no selling yourself in the hallway and so forth, but this is the attitude you're gonna give me.  That's fine, I'll play it your way.  Just keep my coffee cup filled, sweetcheeks, and I won't hassle you no more.

...Unless you change your mind later, Lotus Blossom.

Applejack loves you, baby.

[Johnny The Cook]

Your always welcome to a piece of the cook...but I'm more interested in women who want to have my babies. Julia Roberts for instance.

[hoa nguyen]

Your always welcome to a piece of the cook...but I'm more interested in women who want to have my babies. Julia Roberts for instance.

I think you'd stand a better chance with Julia Roberts than me. That white bitch got a big fucking frog mouth.

[Johnny The Cook]

Your always welcome to a piece of the cook...but I'm more interested in women who want to have my babies. Julia Roberts for instance.

I think you'd stand a better chance with Julia Roberts than me. That white bitch got a big fucking frog mouth.

I appreciate your advice. I'll be interested in her mouth after I've got her knocked up.

[Akker Redd]

And if the children misbehave you can kill them for her.

[Shotoku]

Have My Baby-The Cook's Theme (sung to the tune of Be My Baby written by Phil Spector, Jeff Barry and Ellie Greenwich)

The night we closed the doors I had an idea
It seems the world had ended, but never you fear
I'll take the responsibility
of ensuring humanity
I'll fill their bellies with so much more than grease and beer

So won't you, please (have my, have my baby)
have my shelter baby (one of many shelter babies)
Say you'll be my momma (have my, have my baby)
have my baby now. Wha-oh-oh-oh.

I'll make you happy, Oprah, just wait and see.
For every babe I give someone, I'll give you three.
Oh, Julia don't be jealous
Just take my pearly neaklace
or better yet I'll spend it in your moist pussy

So that you'll (have my, have my baby)
have my shelter baby (one of many shelter babies)
Say you'll be my momma (have my, have my baby)
have my baby now. Wha-oh-oh-oh.

So come on and, please, (have my, have my baby)
have my mutant baby (one of many mutant babies)
Say you'll be my momma (have my, have my baby)
have my baby now. Wha-oh-oh-oh.

BE MY BE MY (have my, have my baby)
have my armageddon baby (one of many armageddon babies)
Say you'll be my momma (have my, have my baby)
have my baby now. Wha-oh-oh-oh.

[Johnny The Cook]

Have My Baby-The Cook's Theme (sung to the tune of Be My Baby written by Phil Spector, Jeff Barry and Ellie Greenwich)

Excellent! There's plenty of Johnny Cook for everybody.

[Akker Redd]

Have My Baby-The Cook's Theme (sung to the tune of Be My Baby written by Phil Spector, Jeff Barry and Ellie Greenwich)

Excellent! There's plenty of Johnny Cook for everybody.

On that note I'm eating out of cans from now on.