Filks don't fail me now

[Zur]

THIS GUY'S IN LOVE WITH GOO (Sung to the tune of "This Guy's In Love With You" by Burt Bacharach)

You see this guy
This guy's in love with goo
Yes, I'm DM
Who uses green slime the way I do?
When you wince I can tell
You know my tricks all too well
How I love to spring these traps
I love to dump you into ooze

‘Cause I've heard some talk
They say you think I'm mean
Yes, I’m DM
And you know that my slime is green
Tell me now is it cruel
To turn your flesh to runny gruel
The goo is dripping
As your skin starts stripping

‘Cause
I need green slime
I want green slime
Hey, you been slimed, slimed by this guy
And soon you’ll just die

Tell me now, does it burn?
To scrape it off will take a turn
The goo is dripping
As your skin starts stripping

‘Cause
I need green slime
I want green slime
Hey, you been slimed, slimed by this guy
And soon you’ll just die

[Dav'l]

And I always thought it was just a fixation with the young children from those Nickelodian shows.

[Mr. Woodhope]

A most excellent filk.

Todd: please keep Mr. Woodhope away from the slime.

[Mr. Woodhope]

Belated...but here it is...my ode to the ultimate DM:

Gygax (Sung to the tune of "Born Free" by Andy Williams)

Gygax, Oh E. Gary Gygax
Author of tomes of facts
Failed his final saving throw

Oh and the E. stood for Ernest
I never would have guessed
I would have used Gary too

Gygax, we owe D&D to you
Neither Wizards of the Coast
Or Hasbro claim that boast

Gygax, still DM ‘til the end
New ways to pretend
Thanks to Gygax

(Gygax, remember the three books)
They had all the rules it took
For us to play all night

Gygax, we will keep on playing
Monsters need slaying
Cheers to Gygax