Filk Against Cthulhu

[Mr. Woodhope]

Vaudeville Hero (to the tune of Foreigner's "Juke Box Hero")

Sitting on his own, in a Harlem bar
Just living the life, of a theatre star
When a white man came in, said he needed someplace
To hold up for a while, and vanish without trace

The sky got dark, in a rolling black out
This was some freaky shit, and he had no doubt
Had to lend a hand and figure this mystery
Or all folks in Harlem would be history

Went to a building, broke in through the rear
Didn’t take long, the coast was clear
Went in a flat, it was way cold
Lurked a gibbering thing, baleful and old

So he started fleein’
Ain’t never gonna stop
Gotta keep on bookin’
Everybody is outta here chop chop

‘Cause he’s a vaudeville hero, got paint on his face
He’s a vaudeville hero
He took one quick shot, vaudeville hero, paint on his face
Vaudeville hero, lets get out of this place

Downtown to the Dent Building, the thugs have been detoured
With just a couple of guards, to keep things secured
But the guards were undead, and they fought like hell
And don’t forget, worm guy was there as well

Now he needs to be fleein’
He just can’t stop
Gotta keep on bookin’
That boy gonna run until he drop

‘Cause he’s a vaudeville hero, feets don’t fail him now
He’s a vaudeville hero, feets don’t fail him now
Yeah, vaudeville hero, feets don’t fail him now
Just one black man, all the rest were white
All the Dents were white

Yeah, he’s gotta keep runnin’
He just can’t stop
Gotta keep on runnin’
That boy will run until he drop

And be a vaudeville hero, starring on the road
He’s a vaudeville hero, this caper sure blowed
Just one blackman, against the undead
He’s just a vaudeville hero, aah aah aah
Vaudeville hero, vaudeville hero, flee to a new zip code
A new zip code

[Nyther]

...wow

[Loken]

Damn, that's a good one!

[Zur]

I'D LIKE TO SERVE CTHULHU (Sung to the tune of "I'd Like to Get to Know You" by Spanky & Our Gang)

Yes, I'd like to serve Cthulhu, if I could
Like to serve Cthulhu
Finally I found
Searching underground
Can't bring back the Old Gods
Then a city undersea
Showed itself to me
And I saw his pseudopods

Yes, I'd like to serve Cthulhu, if I could
Like to serve Cthulhu
Hardly a day goes by
I don't think the end is nigh
I see it form a dark wave
It will soon blot out the sky
And I guess that I
Am meant to be his slave

Yes, I'd like to serve Cthulhu, if I could
Like to serve Cthulhu

Now I can't promise that I'll keep my sanity
Can't promise that I'll still resemble humanity
Can't promise no
I can't promise that I won't eat you

But I'd like to serve Cthulhu
Yes I would, if I could

[Mr. Woodhope]

Woo Hoo! Two filks in a row.

[Loken]

Good stuff guys.

Here is the link to the maps, in case no one looks on the maps thread.

http://www.loxsomdigital.com/dentdocs2.html

These are the current player maps. Things are not to scale on the main map. X marks party location.

The main house is 2 levels, with an enclosed courtyard.

I am willing to answer some questions about these maps.
They reflect currently observed details and may be missing details not yet noticed.

[Dav'l]

Human Worm  (to the tune of "Human Fly" by the Cramps)

Well I'm a human worm
it's spelled W-"erm"
I say "squirm, squirm, squirm,' you cannot remain firm
I'm a human worm, I make stomachs churn
I cause ninety-six fears from ninety-six guys

Got a million brains, I drive the Dents insane
And there's nowhere to hide, the old man hasn't died
So baby best beware, you haven't got a prayer
Cause he's a mindfuck monster using worm warfare

Well I'm a human worm
it's spelled W-"erm"
I say "squirm, squirm, squirm,' you cannot remain firm
I'm a human worm, I make stomachs churn
I cause ninety-six fears from ninety-six guys

Squirm... die tonight
and I say squirm... gonna die
and I say squirm... just say goodbye
I just know you folks will have to die