What happened last night?

Another song for the Hin to sing...

STUPID DWARF (Sung to the tune of “Stupid Girl” by the Rolling Stones)

I'm not talking about the food in his beard
Look at that stupid dwarf
I'm not talking about why he smells weird
Look at that stupid dwarf

The way he picks at his nose
And eats stuff from ‘tween his toes
He’s like a barnacle stuck on a wharf
Well, look at that stupid dwarf

I'm not talking about the emissions of gas
Look at that stupid dwarf
Or the sounds from his rumbling ass
Look at that stupid dwarf

The way he likes to pick fights
Then ducks ‘round the corner in fright
No taller than Tim Conway’s Dorf
Well, look at that stupid dwarf

Well, I'm sick and tired
And I really have my doubts
I've tried and tried
But it never really works out

His ambition has drowned in his beer
Look at that stupid dwarf
He’s made bouncing a lifelong career
Look at that stupid dwarf

It doesn't matter if he tries to groom
His beard still looks like a dusty broom
A spell that rhymes is polymorph
Well, look at that stupid dwarf

Sack-up, sack-up, sack-up, sack-up, sack-up
Sack-up, sack-up, sack-up, sack-up, sack-up
Sack-up, sack-up, sack-up

He waddles around on stubby legs
Look at that stupid dwarf
He looks just like a wooden keg
Look at that stupid dwarf

He likes to talk a big game
But hides three rounds "taking aim"
He’s like a barnacle stuck on a wharf
Well, look at that stupid dwarf